The best way to acquire the mental peace is to keep your cool. This requires great efforts as it implies doing away with reacting to the incidents and the situations. The reaction arouses on part of the expectation(s) one is having. Things happening in an undesirable fashion cause resentment inside, which boils the brain and prompts the individual to react to the situation; such a reaction will yield a zilch. Since we start expecting, these reactions are quite obvious and hence loosing nerves is quite a common phenomenon.
Analyze any situation or an incident, expectation is the root cause. Somewhere, tacitly or explicitly, we are expecting from the people in our vicinity, from the nature, from the family, from the society and even from the GOD, pretty unrealistic, isn’t it??
Anyways, the point is that in order to ensure the mental peace, one has to lower down the expectation level.
Take the example of a relationship. When we are new into any relation, we try to soothe and make the other party feel happy and special. Knowingly or unknowingly, this is where we sow the seeds of expectation. Over the time, when the relation matures, the individuality of both the parties unfolds. At this point in time, crops up the likes and dislikes. What acceptable or enjoying for one will not necessarily be the same for the other half. One wants the other to behave in a manner that suits him/her. The resistance intensifies if the other party is convinced of its actions. Now to sustain this relation, either one or both will have to compromise or adjust the situation to arrive at a win-win state; failing to do that will culminate into the termination or mutual conflicts. The convincing powers here, at the least from one side, should be powerful enough.
These implications can be made void at the beginning itself. All one has to do is to be natural and genuine. The statement of purpose before entering the relation should be vivid and explicit; this will set the expectations right. It is easier said than done as being natural generally invites detestation or criticism or both. You start manipulating the scenarios in multiple dimensions to suit each and every angle. This is what is called as being tactical, being unnatural. Good!!! But???
Are you at peace?? No. The plot devised by you will devise your actions now. Your every action should now fit that plot so that the win-win achieved can be sustained. Unnecessarily inviting the trouble, isn’t it?
It takes guts and great level of self-confidence to be natural. The ability to convince yourself determines the level of self-confidence. It is a radical approach to lead your life in the day-to-day world that is before you, that is observed by you. It will detach you from the regular crowd. Utmost care is required to stop the conversion of this detachment to isolation.
This detachment requires one not to expect or minimize it.
